
Are you ok is what
people ask
Whilst you hide your true feelings
behind your face mask
π
You donβt want to be a burden or
seen as weak
So yes you answer even though all you want to do
is weep
π
We all shouldnβt have to
feel this way
But have the confidence and support to have
our truthful say
π
Itβs time for the stigma to be gone
for good
And for mental health sufferers not
to be misunderstood
People expect us to say that we are fine, regardless of how we really are. And we are so used to just answering, “Yes, I am fine!”
Years ago I met an acquaintance who asked, “How are you.” I replied automatically, “Fine thanks.” Then I added, “Well, my Mum just died.” So he said, “Then you’re not fine.”
It is time for the mental health stigma to be gone, but at least it seems to be more in the open now than it used to be.
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I agree and sorry to hear about your Mum.
It is more in the open now but there is still some way to go I think.
Many thanks for your comment π
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Thank you π My Mum died many years ago, but of course I still miss her and think of her a lot.
Yes, it is only the beginning and we need more education.
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Stuart, I absolutely love this poem. You speak powerful truths that we must not ignore. It is devastating the isolation and loneliness that suffering from any mental health disorder can cause. Being unable to express how we actually feel does no one any good. It’s no wonder then that people feel suicide is their only option in far too many cases. They wonder if anyone at all cares about their genuine thoughts & feelings.
I am grateful for all the advancements we’ve seen in understanding & unawareness of all mental health matters. We still have a long ways to go though. Employers need to be more understanding. Spouses need to acknowledge and support in the tough times. Strangers need to be aware of just how many people are suffering in silence. How many lives could we change for the better if we all genuinely cared to hear an honest answer to, “How are you??” No more empty “I’m fine” when we’re not.
Thanks for using your voice to help others feel not so alone. You’re awesome. Keep up the amazing work you do. Your voice matters! β£
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Many thanks Holly for your lovely words.
I agree with all you have said. In my view we must all continue to use our voice on this subject. Even though Iβm a lot more open about my mental health I will more often that not still say βIβm fineβ except with a few very close people. I also therefore need to work on this.
The more we all talk about this I think only good and progress can come from it.
Many thanks again π
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I completely agree Stuart! I feel like saying “I’m fine” for so many of us has become a protection mechanism too. Empathy is lacking at the moment in most of our culture. For this reason, we only share our hearts with those we hope/trust will honor how we feel. I think that’s okay. Not everyone will care and that has the potential to just hurt even more. You know?
Have a beautiful day, dear Stuart! All my best to you & yours!
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Again I agree! Empathy does seem to be lacking nowadays (not on WordPress I may add!) or maybe itβs just Iβm more aware that itβs not always there.
Itβs probably more of the latter I think.
I hope you have a great day also Holly and thanks again for commenting π
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I feel that so much. I’ve always felt that when someone asks “how are you” they don’t truly want an answer they just want you to say yes so they don’t have to deal with your drama.
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I think we all feel that but there are souls out there who do want to listen and be there for you. We just need to find them I think.
Many thanks for your thoughtful comment π
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Great Poem, it is so true! I like the picture too, it goes perfectly with the poem. π€©
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Thank you π
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Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford and commented:
OH, MAY IT BE!!!!!!!!!
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Few words, Stuart, but full of meaning–the best kind of writing, I think. Thank you for the strong reminder to tune in closely when we ask the question, “how are you.” Sometimes I ask it twice and strive for eye contact, as in: “No, really. How are you? Tell me.” It’s a privilege to offer a safe haven for sharing. And God blesses those who give a listening ear because “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35)!
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Thank you for your lovely comment π
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Amen. So true. Thank you. Love J
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Thank you Joni also for all your kind words on my posts π
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Oh I am so excited that I found you. You liked one of my post and I just looked at your site and I love your work. Your work resonates with so many. Your words are simple but beautifully and wise. What a Sunday blessing for me. Have a great day. Looking forward to reading much more. Love π Joni
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Thank you so much Joni and I look forward to reading your posts also! π
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I know the feeling, you captured it so accurately!
I always feel I am a burden when my anxiety disorder strikes hard and I only recently started to accept this part of me that sometimes puts a spoke in my wheels
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Thank you. I think we all feel like we are a burden sometimes but hopefully that is starting to change π
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Mental health has started to be higher on people’s agendas than it used to be, thank goodness. We suffer in silence and say nothing as we believe that everyone else’s problems are worse so why burden others with ours. Kind thoughts to you.
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Thank you and I agree. Kind thoughts to you too π
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I have suffered severe bullying and tormenting most of my life in so many different forms, none of them less than horrific. Today I have severe PTSD from when bullying got carried away and became assault AND bullying from at least 30 seniors. Today seniors, no longer able to get their Norco and other drugs from their doctors, support the drug dealers big time, for they can always get it from those people. I have one of my degrees in criminal justice, and so you can imagine that I was not popular in that neighborhood. I manage my life fine, but you are right and I love your poem. People say things without having any notion of what they asking, or for that matter, not really wanting to hear more than “Fine, How are you?” I realize that it is a feeble way of communicating but we could as well be ants touching our feelers as we pass by. Thank you kindly for this very thoughtful post.
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This is a very nice post! I also suffer from depression. And sometimes I feel like no one is listen or that no one cares. But I found something that shows that someone cares; sometimes he cares more about yes then we care about ourselves. May I tell you what this person told me?
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This is fantastic.
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Thank you π
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I think it is the stress of behaving one way while feeling another just to fit in that places a lot of undue pressure on people. If hearts could speak to each other and bypass ordinary conventions it would be a different story.
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I completely agree. I used to not be the βtrueβ me. Now I try to be true to myself. Being honest with myself has taught me so much.
Thank you for your comment π
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Poetry is the quickest path to finding the voice of who we really are. I have discarded so many unnecessary layers since expressing myself through my poetry. It is an amazing healing tool.
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Iβve found the same and a voice I never knew I had! π
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Beautiful!
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Thank you! π
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Very skillfully evoked profound truths
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Thank you π
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